Naughty Lemons
2022, Senior, Poetry & Spoken Word
Science says that the ocean is becoming more acidic.
You know what I think?
I think that it’s because of people
Because of people throwing their lemons in the ocean!
“Look, mom, life gave me lemons!”
“Go throw them away.”
“But we’re supposed to make lemonade—”
“We don’t have any sugar! Just throw them in the ocean or something.”
Poor kid.
He just wanted to make lemonade.
Science says that the ocean is becoming more acidic because of climate change.
Yes, climate change.
It’s making more lemons.
Science says it’s due to greenhouse gasses, specifically carbon dioxide.
Yes! Because carbon dioxide is used in photosynthesis!
Making more lemons!
Science says that the ocean is absorbing copious amounts of carbon dioxide which is making the ocean more acidic.
Eh.
So the ocean is going acidic.
What does it matter if the ocean is a 1 on the pH scale?
Science says that this is affecting the animal life, and that creatures who build calciferous shells are most at risk because their shells are weaker, thinner, and less protective from lack of available aragonite, which is a calcium carbonate mineral, which is more easily accessible than calcite, which is a consequence of less carbonate ions, and because of it, shells are lighter in weight and will no longer sink to the bottom of the ocean, which is an important aspect in long-term carbon storage?!
Lemons!
Naughty lemons!
Yes, science, I realize that lemons are not the cause of the ocean’s acidity.
Stop bringing it up? Why?
It’s annoying! Well in my defense!
It’s funny.
And it makes a good analogy.
Yes it does.
Thank you.
So kid, don’t throw your lemons in the ocean.
Even if you don’t have the sugar to make lemonade,
There are still plenty of delicious food delicacies you can make with lemons.
Here’s $10.
Go buy some sugar.