Locked Away
McLean, VA
2025, Junior, Poetry & Spoken Word
For a long time
I wouldn’t look at trees.
I saw them as a painting behind glass—
Present but sealed off,
Beautiful but taboo
I was glued indoors
Mind drifting back to the screen
Fingers scrolling through the phone
Nature was a place I dreaded
Instead of a home I belonged to
The meadows and the light
Begged for my attention, but
I was barred from it
Stuck in the cage called lupus,
Frozen in time and swaying in the air
Never touching the sweet Earth
They spoke of healing but
Healing doesn’t mean a chance to return
It is learning to live with fragments
To dance to a broken rhythm
Their nights became my day
Their dreams my excursions
Sleep became a stranger
That only began when the edges of night receded and
Ended when the sun was overhead
At dawn I rest by the windows
Protected by the iron dome of SPF 50++++
Trying to remember
The giggling sun that tickled my nose
The glittering lakes that licked my feet
The gentle caress of nature
That I can no longer touch
Even though I’m locked away
I reach out to look at the trees
Once more
For a long time
Reflection
I created this piece based on my experiences with lupus and my connection with nature. Nature was a huge part of my life, but all of that changed when I was diagnosed with lupus. It disconnected me from nature, as sunlight can be a big trigger for my immune system. Throughout it all, I have been looking for ways to let me reconnect with nature and can go outside. I found that going out at night solved many of my problems. Through this theme, I have found that connecting with nature doesn't have to always be in the way that other people do. It should be your connection that no one else can have. I want the viewers of my writing to leave with the feeling of hopefulness, a feeling that no matter what happens, preserving and finding new ways to tackle a problem will bring people back on track.